If you’re as old as I am (which is pretty dang old) you might remember a simple book of games called Madlibs. The object was simple: the “writer” would taunt the players into blindly supplying nouns, adjectives, names of famous people, etc. with no idea how they were going to be used. The writer would plug them into blanks in a story, and the fun began. It only took 65 years for the concept to migrate into ChatGPT. One of the things I enjoy most about humor writing with ChatGPT is matching pairs of diverse items with unrelated stories. Then sit back and wait for the action. Just Like Madlibs.…
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A Son’s Letter from School Including Endnotes
Dear Mom and Dad, I hope this letter finds you in the best of health and happiness. I’ve been at MIT for a few weeks now, and boy, do I have a lot to tell you. First of all, the workload is insane! I spend around 30 hours a week just on problem sets[1]. Can you believe it? And that’s just for calculus! The problems involve integral and differential calculus, concepts I thought I had mastered but now seem far more complicated[2]. In Intro to Biology, the lab work involves extracting DNA and then there’s a midterm on cellular structures[3]. You’d think they were training us to clone dinosaurs or…
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Kindergarten: An Adventure Like No Other A preschool valedictorian addresses the challenges of disillusion, failure and broccoli
Ladies and gentlemen, esteemed faculty, proud parents, and my fellow kindergarten graduates. Today is a day of celebration, a day of joy, and a day of reflection. As I stand before you here at The Snickerdoodle Scholars’ Sanctuary, I can’t help but think back to the great times we’ve had at this school. From the moment we first stepped foot into the magical land of finger painting and nap time, we knew we were destined for greatness. We made friends that have lasted a lifetime. Like little Timmy, who taught us the art of Super Gluing our hands together, and Sarah, who showed us the true meaning of sharing when she…
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New Frontiers in Homeschooling Going to school can be tough... even if you never leave home
Like most other parents, my mom and dad agonized over my schooling options during the recent pandemic. After all, their choices were so limited. Short of sending me to the job site with my dad, they were reduced to two choices: break down and buy me a laptop or home school me. They chose the latter. “We were concerned,” said my mom. “We wanted him to experience all of the benefits of homeschooling during the pandemic without sacrificing any of the important social aspects of attending a large public school.” So, they came up with a unique approach to making my experiences at home mirror those I would have at…
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Monkey in a Pink Canoe Why parents refuse to talk about the birds and the bees
“Where did I come from?” asked Shadrach as we pulled up to his football game at Fleigenbaum Field. Having never been married, I thought I’d be exempt from ever having to discuss the birds and the bees with a 6-year-old quarterback, so I never put much thought into what I’d say if asked. Looks like I was going to have to punt. “Well, Shadrach, each month, in one of your mommy’s two ovaries, a few immature eggs develop into follicles. The mature follicle releases an egg during ovulation, which turns into the corpus luteum. Progesterone prepares the endometrium in anticipation of the embryo. Then, your daddy’s sperm travels up the…