Most people, when faced with emotional turmoil or the existential hollowness that can accompany a breakup, life change, or midlife cheese crisis, turn to traditional emotional support animals (ESA). The kind you can walk on a leash, teach to fetch, or post about on social media without having to explain yourself to the FBI. Dogs. Cats. Occasionally, a snake. But…
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Money for Nothing The Misadventures of the Chronically Employed
“That ain’t workin’, that’s the way you do it Get your money for nothing, get your chicks for free” – Dire Straits, 1985 We’ve all done things for money. Some noble. Some necessary. And some that still wake us up at night in a cold sweat, with the faint echo of elevator music and the itch of polyester uniforms. From…
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Your Senior Trip The Ups and Downs of Staying on Your Feet After 65
It happened somewhere over the Rockies, midflight to Denver, when our 747 decided to impersonate a bucking bronco. Luggage compartments popped open like jack-in-the-boxes, a snack cart took a nosedive into first class, and my seatmate—a silver-foxed gentleman with a face like a wise walnut—was flailing for his armrest like it owed him money. “This is nothing,” he bellowed, barely…
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Impulse Control Has Left the Building bvFTD: The Elvis of neurological disorders
Finding accurate, easy-to-read information on the internet these days is like trying to brush your teeth while eating Oreos. Sure, there are plenty of posts, tweets, threads, and AI-generated “expert” breakdowns—but how much of it is actually helpful? These days, everybody with a Wi-Fi connection and a ring light seems to think they’re a neurologist. And trying to understand something…
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Botinal, Bergamot, and Betrayal One Man's Small Price for Looking Perfect
Ah, the folly of youth. Or rather, the folly of middle age, when one suddenly awakens to the quagmire of vanity and seeks—nay, demands—a resurgence, an odyssey back to one’s former splendor. And so, there I was, three days post-divorce, standing before the mirror, staring at the vestige of a man who once gallivanted through life with the audacity of…