“I could play that.” “What are you talking about?” “That. That eerie music thingy.” “Do you mean the theremin?” “Yeah. Well, I don’t know what you call it, but I bet you I could learn how to play it.” “You’re on. I’ll bet you can’t learn how to play Over the Rainbow on the theremin in a month. If you lose, you have to take me out to dinner. If you win, I’ll take you out. I’ll even show you my nipples.” And so, I was off and running in my continuing quest to learn how to play yet another musical instrument — this time the theremin — and get…
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(Don’t Let Me Be) The Last Virgin in Saigon Song writing isn't as easy as it looks... even when you're trying to slide into home
I’d been fogging up the windows with Magda Biedermann for the better part of our senior year. As graduation approached, I had only one thing on my mind: consummating our relationship (and coincidentally, losing my standing as a virgin) before being drafted and sent off to Vietnam. Her motives were considerably more funereal: she wanted to get married and carry our little bun in her oven. My rapaciousness was no match for Magda’s wholesome ambitions, so progress was painfully slow. While I was able to reach first base through a cunning synthesis of deception, chicanery and Olympic-class flexibility, there were no indications that I’d get any further, let alone slide…