Shopping Archives - Allen R Smith

All Entries, ChatGPT, Communication, Humor, Shopping, Writing and Publishing

The Baffling World of Product Labels Decoding the Use of Everyday Items

July 2, 2024

Have you ever found yourself staring at a product label, scratching your head? Wondering if you missed the memo explaining it. Relax, you’re not alone. With retail prices going through the roof, manufacturers are struggling to find ways to enhance the value of their products. One way to do that is to find new, imaginative ways to use their products. Welcome to the wild world of confusing product labels, where Honey Pie Feminine Foaming Wash doubles as a brass tuba polisher, MegaMart’s Hemorrhoid Cream with Lidocaine becomes your go-to for window cleaning, and Original Velveeta Block Cheese can unclog drains. Join me as we navigate the labyrinth of product descriptions…

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Two Years After My Adoption Narrated by Dewie the Cat and Richard Burton
May 11, 2024

Billionaires in Space Sir Richard Branson becomes the first to complain about in-space food service and movies
July 17, 2021

New Horizons in Weight Control Exciting inventions to help you lose weight without counting calories or going on a diet
July 1, 2021
All Entries, ChatGPT, Family, Home Life, Humor, Shopping

IKEA Unveils Car Kits for Quick and Easy Transportation From Flat-Pack to Fast-Track

June 11, 2024

Stockholm, Sweden – In a bold and innovative move, IKEA, the multi-national conglomerate has announced the launch of its Home Car Kits,® a groundbreaking product line designed to revolutionize personal transportation. This new offering allows customers to assemble their own cars in the comfort of their living rooms, bringing IKEA’s renowned do-it-yourself ethos to the automotive industry. Beginning August 1, 2024, the Home Car Kits® promise to deliver the ultimate in convenience, affordability, and sustainability. Each kit contains all the necessary components and tools, along with IKEA’s famous reputation for providing straightforward instructions, enabling customers to build their own fully functional vehicles. “At IKEA, we’re always looking for new ways to empower…

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Overweight: One for the Price of Two Airlines are getting hammered with heavy loads... and they're fighting back
March 15, 2016

When Life Gives You Gorilla Glue Unbelievable Tales of Everyday Absurdities
January 28, 2024

(Don’t Let Me Be) The Last Virgin in Saigon Song writing isn't as easy as it looks... even when you're trying to slide into home
October 7, 2016
All Entries, Appearance, ChatGPT, Fashion, Home Life, Humor, Shopping

One Size Fits All Shoes Revolutionize Footwear Industry A Perfect Fit Every Time

June 11, 2024

New York, NY – In a groundbreaking development poised to redefine the footwear industry, SmartStep Technologies has announced the launch of its new AdaptiveFit Shoes®, one-size-fits-all shoes with Self-Adjusting Length and Width shoes. This innovative product promises to eliminate the age-old problem of finding the perfect fit, offering a personalized and comfortable experience for everyone. The new AdaptiveFit Shoes®, available beginning July 1, 2024, uses space-age technology to automatically adjust shoes to the wearer’s foot size and shape. These shoes are designed to cater to all foot types, ensuring optimal comfort and support with every step. “At SmartStep Technologies, we believe that comfort should not be compromised for style,” said…

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38 Million Minutes to Go It took me years to discover that I, alone, control the time I spend on earth--good Lord!
November 18, 2016

Kisses Are Like Snowflakes The things my sister never taught me about kissing
September 7, 2016

What Do You Do at Work Daddy? Exploring the Many Sides of Fatherhood Using ChatGPT
January 1, 2024
All Entries, ChatGPT, Fashion, Humor, Shopping

World’s First Edible Shoes Hit the Market The Tastiest Trend in Fashion

June 11, 2024

Paris, France – In a groundbreaking fusion of fashion and gastronomy, the world’s first edible shoes are set to debut, promising to revolutionize the way we think about footwear and snacks. Developed by the innovative team at Gourmet Couture, these shoes are poised to make a substantial impact on both the fashion industry and the culinary world. The edible shoes, branded as Shoe-Snacks® offer a unique blend of practicality and novelty, appealing to fashion enthusiasts and foodies alike. Made entirely from sustainable, organic ingredients, these shoes are designed to be both stylish and delicious, making them the perfect accessory for any event, whether you’re hitting the runway or heading to a…

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On Becoming a Successful Writer Everything you need to know to guarantee your success as a writer
January 19, 2016

Great Achievements in Medical Fraud How the foot operated breast enlarger and Recto Rotor revolutionized medicine
April 20, 2017

Promises of Thrills, Chills and Spills for the New Olympics! The International Olympic Committee announces the new line-up of events for the Paris 2024 Olympic Games!
July 26, 2021
All Entries, Business and Work, Communication, History, Home Life, Humor, Shopping

Recycled Slogans The New Frontier in Advertising

December 7, 2023

In the realm of advertising, a powerful slogan is timeless. From Finger-Lickin’ Good to Just Do It, catchy phrases have not only defined brands but also embedded themselves in our cultural fabric. Many of the original patents for beloved product slogans have recently expired leaving thousands of them “up for grabs.” This presents a problem for some and a new opportunity for others to scoop up these catchphrases, giving new meaning to the question, “Where do you want to go today?” Let’s take a look… Here’s a list of some of the more well-known and beloved slogans from the past and the companies that spawned them: “Think Outside the Bun”…

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Last Chance Underwear Skidmarks and the smell of kids... everything you ever wanted to know about rectal hygience
May 11, 2016

A Son’s Letter from School Including Endnotes
October 25, 2023

The $84 Windpipe Never order anything you can't spell
July 11, 2016