The early bird catches the worm So, we’ve all heard the phrase “The early bird catches the worm,” right? A classic nugget of wisdom, passed down through generations, warning us that if we hit snooze one too many times, some overachieving, oat-milk-latte-drinking go-getter is gonna snatch our opportunities right out from under us. But let’s be real—what kind of lunatic bird wants a worm? That’s not a reward. That’s a punishment. Imagine rolling out of bed at the crack of dawn, racing to the front of the breakfast line, and all they’ve got is a raw, wriggling, protein-packed worm. “Oh wow, thanks, Nature. No eggs? No toast? Just a dirt-flavored…
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So, You’re Adopting a Gorilla! What you need to know about bringing Emotional Support Animals into your home
Bringing an Emotional Support Animal (ESA) into your life is a big decision—one that offers companionship, comfort, and, in some cases, a fair amount of unpredictability. While many people turn to traditional choices like dogs and cats, others find emotional support in more exotic and unconventional creatures. Some ESAs are quiet, low-maintenance, and easy to care for—ideal for those who want a soothing presence without too much responsibility. Others are visually striking and fascinating to observe but prefer admiration from a distance rather than direct interaction. Then there are those that demand respect, offering a powerful presence but requiring careful handling and an understanding that affection is not part of…
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Forrest Gump Runs Faster! The man the myth the marathon
Original Premise: Forrest Gump (1994) – “Run, Forrest, Run!” As young Forrest, previously unable to walk without braces, breaks into a full sprint, shattering his leg supports, it becomes a triumphant and emotional turning point. Opening Scene A dusty Alabama road stretches into the distance. Forrest, no more than a boy, stands awkwardly on the sidewalk, his legs encased in massive braces that look like a hybrid between scaffolding and a small radio tower. A gang of bullies on bicycles, each wearing matching jackets that read “Future Convicts of America”, pedals toward him. Bully #1: Well, look who it is. If it ain’t the Tin Man’s understudy. Bully #2: Hey,…
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The Fruitcake Files No-Nonsense Tips for Surviving Modern Relationships
The “Fruitcake Lady” was Marie Rudisill, an American author and television personality known for her candid, humorous, and often salty advice. She gained fame in the early 2000s through her appearances on “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno” during a segment called “Ask the Fruitcake Lady.” She became a viral sensation thanks to her quick wit, straightforward demeanor, and unfiltered advice. Her segments covered a range of topics, from relationships to etiquette, with a biting humor that audiences adored. We’re honored to present some of them here. How do you handle a husband who snores like a freight train? Well, let me tell ya somethin’, dealin’ with a husband who snores…
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How Many Gen Zs Does It Take to Change a Lightbulb? What’s a Lightbulb?
January 24, 2025 By Ludmila Gavranović The Đurđevac Herald Đurđevac, Croatia A recent poll conducted by the highly respected Institute for Generalized Panic and Widespread Disappointment (IGPWD) has revealed that nearly 90% of Gen Z participants are utterly befuddled by the concept of how to change a lightbulb. Once an assumed skill passed down through generations like sourdough starters or the irrational fear of quicksand, the art of lightbulb replacement now teeters on the edge of extinction. “It’s just so…round,” mused Zolton “Ziggy” Borkovic, a Senior Research Analyst at the University of Appliance Awareness in Bratislava. “One cannot simply expect these kids to interface with ancient technology when their entire…
