The first thing I noticed about the gleaming new Porsche was the way it was parked–strategically straddling a disabled space and the one next to it—my parking space. But, instead of throwing a hissy fit, I calmly took out my car keys and gouged a continuous line along the entire side of the car. That is, after I surgically removed both windshield wipers and liberated the air from all four tires. So much for social and personal boundaries. I suppose to some my reaction might have been a tad over the top for something as innocuous as stealing a parking space. But, it’s my space. It’s the one possession I…
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Urban Manouflage A man tries lipstick, eyeliner and Radiance Wonder Glow... and lives to talk about it
Three days after my divorce was final, I decided to get back into the game. I’d been single long enough. “Well, if you’re going to start dating again, you had better do something about the way you look,” complained my brother. He had a point. I looked old and tired. Well beyond my years. And, while I’ve always considered my body a temple, lately I allowed it to deteriorate to an urban housing tract; especially my face. I had to do something, and do it fast. One of the most popular trends modern men are using to improve the way they look is men’s cosmetics. Like coloring their hair, men’s…
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Monkey in a Pink Canoe Why parents refuse to talk about the birds and the bees
“Where did I come from?” asked Shadrach as we pulled up to his football game at Fleigenbaum Field. Having never been married, I thought I’d be exempt from ever having to discuss the birds and the bees with a 6-year-old quarterback, so I never put much thought into what I’d say if asked. Looks like I was going to have to punt. “Well, Shadrach, each month, in one of your mommy’s two ovaries, a few immature eggs develop into follicles. The mature follicle releases an egg during ovulation, which turns into the corpus luteum. Progesterone prepares the endometrium in anticipation of the embryo. Then, your daddy’s sperm travels up the…
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The Golden Era of Cigarette Ads When cigarette smoking, big tobacco and lung cancer were cool
When Sir Walter Raleigh helped to popularize tobacco during the 16th century, he probably had no idea that he would be responsible for cigarette ads; one of the largest and most profitable advertising campaigns in the history of Madison Avenue. Campaigns that would see a single product go from lifestyle enhancement to a pariah of the medical community within a matter of years. Give Me Your Young at Heart Before their negative association with health, cigarettes were marketed to successful young men and women as a way to relax and get more out of life. Advertisements were filled with virile, athletic men and women prancing around tennis courts in snow-white…
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Help on the Home Front On television, there’s always an easy, happy ending to alcoholism. Ah, if it were only that way in real life.
The scene opens with a small, emotional group of family and friends huddled around the struggling alcoholic about to perform an intervention – a showdown of sorts – aimed at helping the afflicted change their ways. After an hour, the tears flow, everyone hugs each other and the alcoholic makes a miraculous recovery. On television, there’s always an easy, happy ending. Ah, if it were only that way in real life. To the uninitiated, the portrait of the alcoholic or drug abuser (who, we’ll refer to as addicts) is evident: the scruffy, unemployed middle-age man sleeping under a bridge with his bottle of Mad Dog 20/20 in a brown paper…
