Original Premise: King Kong (1933) – Kong vs. the Biplanes Perched atop the Empire State Building, Kong swats at attacking planes before tumbling to his death, a tragic ending to cinema’s first great monster love story. Opening Scene The Empire State Building looms against the night sky, its lights flickering from the sheer amount of screaming, panicking people running below. At the very top, King Kong clings to the antenna like a kid who climbed too high on a jungle gym and immediately regretted it. A gust of wind ruffles his fur. He scratches his head, wondering how exactly he got there. His massive fingers, still clutching Ann Darrow, tighten…
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The Ex-Terminator He said he’d be back he was and now there’s a huge mess
Original Premise: The Terminator (1984) – “I’ll Be Back” Arnold Schwarzenegger’s T-800 calmly assesses a police station before uttering the now-legendary catchphrase and returning moments later to obliterate everything in sight. Opening Scene A dimly lit police station, buzzing with the sound of ringing phones, clacking typewriters, and officers making coffee strong enough to dissolve metal. Desks are cluttered with paperwork, half-eaten donuts, and at least one goldfish in a coffee mug labeled “World’s Best Cop.” At the front desk, a bored desk sergeant flips through an adult magazine titled Guns & Buns: The Quarterly Review of What’s Hot and Who’s Not. He barely looks up as the Terminator strides…
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Forrest Gump Runs Faster! The man the myth the marathon
Original Premise: Forrest Gump (1994) – “Run, Forrest, Run!” As young Forrest, previously unable to walk without braces, breaks into a full sprint, shattering his leg supports, it becomes a triumphant and emotional turning point. Opening Scene A dusty Alabama road stretches into the distance. Forrest, no more than a boy, stands awkwardly on the sidewalk, his legs encased in massive braces that look like a hybrid between scaffolding and a small radio tower. A gang of bullies on bicycles, each wearing matching jackets that read “Future Convicts of America”, pedals toward him. Bully #1: Well, look who it is. If it ain’t the Tin Man’s understudy. Bully #2: Hey,…
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Titanic Love Story on a Door Now with 50% more ice
Original Premise: Titanic (1997) – “I’ll Never Let Go” As Jack slowly sinks into the freezing Atlantic, Rose clings to him before finally letting go, leaving audiences devastated and debating whether or not there was room on that door. Opening Scene A vast, icy expanse. The remains of the HMS Titanic bob in the water as Jack clings to the edge of a massive wooden door, his lips bluer than a New York cab driver’s language. Rose lies comfortably atop the door, drier than a sandwich. The orchestra continues floating nearby, still playing, their instruments now replaced with various species of fish. Jack: Rose, I… I don’t think I’m gonna…
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Alien Chestburster Chaos In space no one can hear you scream laugh fart or sneeze
Original Premise: Alien (1979) – The Chestburster Scene A quiet meal among the crew turns into pure horror as an alien creature violently erupts from Kane’s chest. The shock, the gore, and the sheer terror made this an all-time great. Opening Scene A dimly lit mess hall aboard the spaceship Nostromo. The crew sits around a steel table, eating a meal that looks suspiciously like 1978 high school cafeteria food. Kane chews with great enthusiasm, despite everyone else eying his food suspiciously. Dallas: So, Kane, how’s the stomach? Feeling better? Kane: Oh yeah, much better. You know, just your standard violent space illness followed by sudden and complete recovery. Classic…
