It’s late summer and before you know it, our national forests will once again be teeming with overweight, beer-guzzling, middle-aged men bonding with their offspring, engaged in an annual wilderness right of passage: deer and elk hunting season. Across the United States, there have always been three traditional hunting seasons: muzzleloader and archery followed by high-power rifle season. Short of…
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Steroids Invade the World of Chess How Bobby Baines got pumped up for his competitions
Canton, Ohio – The professional chess world was rocked today when 13 year old chess prodigy, Bobby Baines, was disqualified from play for testing positive for steroids. Clayton Groman, Director of the United States Chess Federation announced during a press conference from his office in Crossville, Tennessee that Baines was one of 17 professional chess players ranging in ages from…
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Golf Course Thugs The subtlties of contact golf, pilfering balls and napalming fairways
I love sports. And, considering there isn’t an athletic gene in my entire family, I manage to do pretty well at anything I decide to try – except golf. Looking back, I’m not really sure why I took up golf in the first place. It’s the one sport that, the harder I tried, the worse I got. I was in…
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Disneyland… The Happiest Summit on Earth Greetings and salutations from the highest peak in Anaheim, California
By the time the kids were let out for summer vacation, the climbing window for summiting Mt. Everest had already come and gone. I promised Shimmel that I would take him and his 8-year-old sister Toiba to the top of Mt. Everest to celebrate his circumcision, but none of the guide companies would have anything to do with a middle-aged,…
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Sarah’s Will What happens when you pit a strong-willed athlete with catastrophe? Gold medal success, of course
Anyone who’s gone through a life-changing event will tell you that transformations do not always happen for the worse. Sometimes, what may seem to be a catastrophic turn of events can end up reshaping your entire reason for being. In December of 1988, Sarah Will was a jubilant, attractive college graduate working as a carpenter in Aspen, Colorado. On her…