Los Angeles, California – American authorities announced yesterday that they had successfully thwarted an attempt by terrorists to detonate a sticky bomb made from a 1-liter bottle of Diet Coke and Mentos candy mints, preventing what could have been the messiest attack on U.S. air carriers in aviation history. The Transportation Security Administration first became aware of the threat after…
-
-
Disneyland… The Happiest Summit on Earth Greetings and salutations from the highest peak in Anaheim, California
By the time the kids were let out for summer vacation, the climbing window for summiting Mt. Everest had already come and gone. I promised Shimmel that I would take him and his 8-year-old sister Toiba to the top of Mt. Everest to celebrate his circumcision, but none of the guide companies would have anything to do with a middle-aged,…
-
Last Chance Underwear Skidmarks and the smell of kids... everything you ever wanted to know about rectal hygience
When I was a kid growing up in southern California, I’d try to escape the blistering summer heat by playing in the sprinklers on the front lawn or floating submerged in a public swimming pool until my fingers turned to prunes. I counted those hours under water as part of my daily hygienic practices. My mother didn’t. At that age…
-
Intercourse and Horneytown Great places to live besides Looneyville, Wetwang or Goosepimple Junction
Whether you live in a small town or a large city, where you ultimately plant your feet has a lot to say about who you are. Some people choose to live in places like Wetwang, England because they work there. Others have deep rooted family trees in Looneyville, Minnesota. And what high-powered executive wouldn’t jump at the chance to get…
-
Employment is a Full-Time Job For every job, there is an inverse relationship between its potential earnings and the happiness it brings
I wasn’t born to be a sperm donor. Nor was it my lifelong dream to be a grave digger, dog food tester or phone sex worker – but I’ve done all four. And worse. For as long as I can remember I’ve had trouble settling on a career. Unlike most of my high school classmates who instantly knew they wanted…
