Nestled in the shadow of the world’s tallest peak, Mt. Everest Funland is redefining the ski experience by eliminating skiing altogether. And now, it’s set to become even more exhilarating with a slate of high-altitude luxury upgrades, ensuring that even the most adventure-averse travelers can say they’ve “conquered Mt. Everest” without breaking a sweat. Or a femur.
High-Altitude Lifts That Go Up and Never Come Down
Ski lifts usually exist to ferry skiers up a mountain so they can glide back down. Not here. Mt. Everest Funland is introducing its first-ever Luxury Lift System, an elaborate network of state-of-the-art lifts that ascend straight to the Death Zone (8,000 meters and up) without requiring passengers to come back down. Each gondola is equipped with hand-stitched Corinthian leather seats, supplemental oxygen masks, and a complimentary glass of champagne, because nothing says “high society” like sipping bubbly at an altitude where your lungs stop working properly.
For thrill-seekers who crave just a little more excitement, Mt. Everest Funland will offer the Khumbu Icefall Express, a 36-passenger high-speed chairlift that whisks guests directly over this notoriously treacherous glacier. While mountaineers below navigate shifting ice blocks and bottomless crevasses with ropes and ladders, you’ll hover above them in comfort, enjoying a curated soundtrack of the mooing and grunting of Himalayan Yaks accompanied by the unmistakable hum of distant avalanches.
Dining at the Top of the World in Mt. Everest’s First Five-Star Restaurant
Food tastes different at extreme altitudes, mostly because the human body is too busy fighting for survival to care about flavors. But that hasn’t stopped Mt. Everest Funland from launching the Summit Supper Club, the highest fine-dining establishment in the world, perched precariously atop Camp IV on the South Col route.
The multi-course menu, prepared by a rotating cast of celebrity chefs who may or may not have summited Mt. Everest themselves, features dishes designed to pair perfectly with the lack of oxygen. Guests can enjoy Flash-frozen caviar, Yak-butter-infused foie gras, and the pièce de résistance, Mt. Everest Air Sorbet, a dish consisting entirely of thin, hypoxic air, served in a hand-carved ice bowl.
Lodging Fit for an Ice King
Tired of cramped, frostbitten tents? Mt. Everest Funland’s new Crystal Summit Chalets redefine mountaintop luxury. These fully heated, Wi-Fi-enabled glass domes offer panoramic views of the Death Zone, where climbers risk their lives daily, providing hours of entertainment from the comfort of your own Mountain Weasel-lined recliner. Each chalet comes with a personal Sherpa concierge, oxygen bar, and, for the especially brave, a “window into the abyss” floor panel that offers a clear view of the 10,000-foot drop below.
For those who prefer a more rustic experience, Mt. Everest Funland has also introduced the Hillary Huts, minimalist, eco-friendly cabins positioned near the legendary Hillary Step. While traditional climbers struggle against howling winds and bone-chilling temperatures, guests of the Hillary Huts can enjoy the same harsh conditions while wrapped in a cashmere blanket, sipping complimentary mugs of hot Yak Cocoa.
Après-Ski Like You’ve Never Experienced Before
Après-ski culture is synonymous with cozy fires, mulled wine, and lighthearted revelry. Mt. Everest Funland’s version is a little more… intense. Introducing the South Col Lounge, the first cocktail bar located in an area where prolonged exposure can literally kill you. Patrons can sip a Frostbite Martini (served at a brisk -40°F) while testing their endurance against the elements. The signature drink menu also includes:
- The Crevasse Shot – Raksi served in an ice-carved shot glass with a drop of pure Everest meltwater, rumored to contain the essence of long-lost explorers.
- Avalanche Punch – A potent, high-altitude rum blend of Nepali Hog Plum, Wild Himalayan Raspberry, and Indian Gooseberry. Shaken not stirred.
- Oxygen on the Rocks – A bottle of supplemental oxygen nestled on a bed of finely crushed Qomolangma Formation Limestone, because let’s be honest, you’re going to need it.
Live entertainment includes Sherpa DJs spinning high-altitude disco favorites, interrupted by the occasional rescue operation, adding an element of unpredictable excitement to the night’s festivities.
Why Book Mt. Everest Funland Now?
With these cutting-edge expansions, Mt. Everest Funland is poised to become the most thrilling winter destination on Earth, without all the hassle of actually having to ski. Whether you want to ascend to new heights in a luxury gondola, dine at the top of the world, or sip cocktails in the most inhospitable après-ski lounge known to man, this is your chance to experience Mt. Everest without ever having to don a single crampon.
And coming next year? The world’s first zip line from the Balcony to Base Camp along with the Mt. Everest Midnight Boogie, where guests will be guided through the glacier under the glow of headlamps, searching for the elusive, frostbitten footprints of past adventurers.
Experiencing Mt. Everest Funland isn’t just a vacation—it’s survival chic for the whole family. Bring the kids! Come for the impossible amenities. Stay for the bragging rights, and leave with stories that’ll elevate your dinner-party game. Luxury and danger have never paired this well or been this breathtakingly literal.
Book now, before the next blizzard rolls in!
Orville T. Butterbean is a Depression-era travel writer whose work has been described as “dangerously informative” and “probably exaggerated.” His award-winning articles include “The Time I Outswam a Tsunami”, “Dining at the Edge of a Volcano”, and “How to Order Coffee in 47 Countries Without Getting Arrested.”
