Dining with and entertaining out of town guests can be difficult. Especially when it comes to finding original, trendy places to dine. After all, once you’ve had one surf & turf, you’ve had them all. Fortunately, the food and beverage industry is never at a loss for new and unusual places to eat. Here’s a list of my favorite new restaurants. Admittedly, I haven’t been to them all, but they’re on my bucket list.
The Heart Attack Grill – Dallas, Texas and Chandler, Arizona
The Heart Attack Grill makes no apologies for its menu. In fact, every featured item embraces an unhealthy diet. Located in Chandler, Arizona and Dallas, Texas, the Heart Attack Grill includes items like the Single, Double, Triple and Quadruple Bypass Burgers that can have as much as two pounds of beef and have over 8,000 calories. Accompany your burger with an order of Flatliner Fries (cooked in pure lard), a pure Butterfat Shake or a tall glass of full sugar Coca-Cola® and you’ll be well on your way to heart disease. As an added bonus, anyone who finishes a Quadruple Bypass Burger receives a free ride to their car in a wheelchair.
Cannibalistic Sushi – Tokyo, Japan
If you think that once you’ve eaten at one sushi restaurant, you’ve eaten at them all, you’re in for a surprise. The staff at Cannibalistic Sushi begins by wheeling in a female body made of dough to your table. The body contains organs that are made from a delicious selection of sushi items. The hostess begins your dining experience by splaying open the body’s chest with a scalpel, then inviting patrons to “dig in.”
Modern Toilet – Taipei, Taiwan
For many people, décor is as important as the menu in the overall dining experience. Embracing that belief, Modern Toilet seats hungry guests on western-style commodes and uses rolls of toilet paper instead of napkins. Drinks are served in miniature urinals and guests can enjoy a wide variety of offerings, including feces-shaped chocolate soft serve.
Pitch Black Restaurant – Beijing, China
If you’re looking for a dimly lit, intimate dining experience to impress your first date, then the Pitch Black Restaurant is for you. Diners eat in total darkness – so dark, you can’t see your hand in front of your face. Waiters wearing night vision goggles bring your food to your table and help you to find the plate that’s sitting directly in your lap.
Alcatraz ER – Tokyo, Japan
Everyone enjoys good hospital food. And, for those who want the best, Alcatraz ER couples the sterility of a hospital with the feeling of confinement at the famous federal penitentiary. The evening begins by scantily clad “nurses” handcuffing you to their wrist while transporting you to your cell. While sitting in captivity, you can order delicacies like Dead Chicken, Penis Sausage and intestines.
Cereality – Dallas-Fort Worth, Texas; Mankato, Minnesota; Dayton, Ohio and Morgantown, West Virginia
For those of you who love breakfast at any time of the day, you’ll love the concept behind Cereality. Founded by two entrepreneurs who just love a good bowl of cereal, Cereality feels instantly familiar. Walk up to the counter and you can order items off the “Our Way” menu, like “PB & Crunch,” “Life’s a Bowl of Cherries,” “Flak n’ Out,” or “S’More Than You Know.” Or, you can order from the “Your Way” menu by combining any one of more than 14 types of cereal like Fruit Loops, Cheerios, Frosted Mini Wheats and Raisin Bran, topped off with almonds, blueberries, crushed Oreo cookies, pecans, raisins and many others – 23 in all. Cereality also caters events and sells U.S. franchises.
Buns and Guns – Beirut, Lebanon
Diners interested in a more military experience will love the food and décor of Buns and Guns. Patterned around Lebanon’s 2006 War with Israel, guests enjoy menu items like the M16 Carbine sandwich, the Mortar Burger or Terrorist Meal, while the constant drone of helicopters and land mine explosions blare loudly overhead.
Cabbages & Condoms – Bangkok, Thailand
Cabbages & Condoms is a unique dining experience that is a joint effort between private interests and the Population and Community Development Association, dedicated to promoting birth control. Featuring menu items like Spicy Condom Salad, the restaurant offers exiting guests condoms instead of breath mints.
Hobbit House – Manila, Philippines
Advocates of political correctness may want to think twice before eating at the Hobbit House. Founded by a former Peace Corps volunteer and J.R.R. Tolkien fan, the Hobbit House is staffed by the smallest waiters in the world.
Dinner in the Sky – Las Vegas, Nevada
Just when you think that Las Vegas has conquered every unique experience on earth, along comes Dinner in the Sky. Suspended over 180 feet in the air on a clear Plexiglas floor, 22 diners enjoy some of the most spectacular views of the gambling empire, while dining on fine food prepared and served by Sky Chefs. For $289, each guest is picked up and dropped off at their hotel, enjoys a red carpet reception and a complimentary photograph, memorializing the evening. Guests must be at least four feet tall and weigh less than 300 pounds. Visits to the restroom are discouraged.
Rising Sun Anger Release Bar – Nanjing City, China
If a good, stiff drink (or two) fails to help you deal with the stress of a day at the office, then perhaps punching one of the staff at the Rising Sun Anger Release Bar could be the ticket. Customers pay an entrance fee at the door, then are free to yell, throw glasses, degrade and beat up the staff. Members of the staff wear specially designed protective equipment and will even dress up to resemble the person you’d really like to pulverize (your boss?). The bar is said to be particularly popular with Chinese women in the service industry.
Dick’s Last Resort – Petco Park, California, Las Vegas, Nevada and other locations
People who enjoy a five-star dining experience and staff catering to their every needs should go somewhere else than Dick’s Last Resort. Famous for its memorable dining décor of picnic tables and no tablecloths, Dick’s hires only obnoxious servers who throw your napkins and utensils at you, while spewing forth insults. Diners wear “bibs,” or paper hats to wear through the meal, that are emblazoned with insults like, “Member of the Manson family,” “I’m wearing Hannah Montana’s underwear,” “Accepting hair donations here,” “Retired Pole Dancer” and “I’m so old, I fart dust.”
So, regardless of where you live, there’s always a new and unusual place for you to insult your friends, relatives and guests at the dinner table. Be bold. Be creative. But, above all, be daring!
